I found a friend for you.
One who listens and learns. One who stands close by, always accentuating the best you have to offer of yourself. The one who doesn’t bother you when you don’t want to speak. He seems to have a knack for timing, that fellow. He’ll hang around for a while when you’re in the mood, indulging you with silly games.
But then again, he doesn’t mind getting up close and personal, helping cure you of all your little imperfections without judgement.
I really found you a friend!
I mean, I found you a mirror.
La más vieja sólo habla Español
La más joven, sólo Inglés
Y sin embargo, se comunican.
El cariño no tiene idioma
That’s So Miami.
What’s worse: being dumb, or knowingly practicing ignorance?
Looking at the news everyday I see people lying to themselves, playing themselves all the time. If you can’t be truthful to yourself, than how can you ever expect that someone would trust you?
Reporters and media organizations blatantly taking sides on issues, while professing neutrality. It is disgusting. I just wonder what the people themselves think. Has everyone sold their souls, and in turn their solidarity in the name of the almighty dollar? I am lucky enough to work for an organization that values logic and true neutrality over the rat race that the media landscape has become. But we are a blessed minority.
Who out there would be willing to betray their team in front of the whole world? And would the public even appreciate the courage that it would take, or would they just crucify the offender?
The new media landscape has provided many an avenue for validation, and all but eliminated the avenues of unbiased information.
Apparently people would rather be told what to think and stick to it rather than suffer a fleeting moment of confusion. Or, rather— critical thinking.
Love is a hard thing to hate. It also should be a hard thing to legislate against.
But the real world doesn’t always use my brand of rationality.
To say that we live in a time of polarity would be an understatement. As we sit on the edges of our seats waiting for the courts to decide on the Defense of Marriage Act and Proposition 8, I cannot believe that hate is to blame for the gay community’s struggles.
I cannot accept that in 2013, with all the obstacles that have been overcome by minorities in this country, that hate of this caliber still exists on such massive scale.
I simply refuse to believe it.
I insist that what we have here is a semantic misunderstanding.
Across cultures since the birth of man, what we know as ‘marriage’ has been loosely defined as the union of a man and woman into a family unit. Few would debate that statement.
On the other side of the coin, homosexuality has always existed in society. If we take a look into antiquity, to the Greeks and the Romans it was a normal part of life to engage in homosexual behavior. It occurs in nature, across species. This is not speculation. It is fact.
When these two parallel pieces of life began to veer off course in the 20th century (in the West), their collision left certain things to be reckoned with. Heterosexual behavior was no longer the only option. As activists like Harvey Milk gained popularity and acceptance in society, so did the ideals that they embodied. Traditional ideas of love and marriage were put on the defensive. The status quo was at risk, and some were unwilling to compromise. Some still are.
When we talk about the word marriage, we must come to terms with the fact that the word is loaded with millennia of history. It is an act of desperation on the part of the LGBT community to think that a simple declaration can undo the ideals that have been passed down since time immemorial.
It is my personal opinion that much of the recent plight of the gay community largely comes from refusing to accept for anything less than dominion over the word marriage.
Likewise, it is shameful for those who wish to deny to the LGBT community the same rights that the rest of the population enjoys.
If we were to remove the word marriage from the equation, what other solutions might we be able to reach?
I say this knowing well that many might get defensive on the topic. But really— what other option is there? Even if you do “marry,” many will refuse to accept the term as a matter of culture, regardless of what the law says.
The one thing that we should all be able to agree upon is the right to devote yourself to someone that you love. Denial of this basic right stands apart from the loaded word “marriage,” and speaks to the human condition that unites all of us. Why should anybody be denied the right to make such a proclamation and have it stand legally? Homosexuality aside, there might even be situations where such a declaration could be of use in a strictly platonic relationship. If an aging group of friends finds themselves without spouses, who are we to tell them that they cannot devote themselves to each other, that this other person cannot be trusted with the toughest of decisions in our final hours? Who makes that call? And who are we to deny someone’s right to make it?
Or is this whole thing about taxes and inheritance?
I refuse to believe that we are really talking about denying someone of these simple rights. What we are battling is the history and popular understanding of what marriage is. Not companionship. These two words overlap, and they are not the same thing, but they are equally as important. At least in my mind they are.
Depending on what happens later this week in the courts, it might be time for both sides to take a breather, and finally start making rational, measured decisions. It may mean setting a new precedent in a way that neither party can imagine.
In times of change, a lack of meaningful language is often the cause of frustration, confusion, and chaos. Maybe it is time we try a different route.
Check out and FOLLOW That’s So Miami, our Tumblr for a poetry project until the end of April (National Poetry Month)
Cafe con leche, coffee, cuppa joe
60 in the morning, 90 in the afternoon
Pouring rain Monday, blistering hot Tuesday
Beaches and buildings and street vendors and tourists and palm trees and rain and sun and sand and art and architecture and blue skies and warm streets
That’s so Miami.